Hello CONNECTors!
I just finished reading the article I wrote for MathBits around this time last year. Last year I wrote about how I was struggling to decide how I was going to start the year with my classes. This seems to be a recurring theme for me, but starting this year was even more of a challenge because I wasn’t entirely sure 1) which model my district was going to be in, 2) what classes I was teaching, 3) how long my classes were going to be, and 4) how many of my students were going to opt for distance learning. The list of questions seems endless, but eventually those main questions were answered. Nonetheless, I felt and still feel overwhelmed with it all. The first week of teaching felt like a month. Each day brings new challenges. The work is never done. I’m in my 13th year of teaching and am struggling to find my groove. I could continue with my difficulties.
I’m not trying to complain, but this is exactly what I want to address this year–the harsh reality that this job is sometimes difficult–really difficult. This is a hard year and that is okay. As a society (or maybe just me personally), I feel like we (I) always strive for perfection. I want the lesson to go just right. I want to find the best activity. I want my students to have the best math learning experience possible. However to keep up with those demands is nearly impossible–especially with the ever-changing job description 2020 has brought upon us. I’m learning to let go. I have enough stress in my life right now that I have to let go. If my lesson isn’t planned perfectly, or maybe not even fully planned until the class starts, it is okay. As difficult as it is for me to acknowledge, sometimes my lessons will have to be “good enough”. We are not living or teaching in an ideal situation. It is silly to think that my lessons will be ideal. I am doing the best I can with what I’ve got while trying to keep my sanity. I need to make time to focus on my own wellbeing. Sometimes that means that my job will have to be put on the back burner. And that is okay. So what if the lesson flops? The kids will be okay. They are resilient. And I just have to try something different the next day or even the class period. In order to be able to show up mentally, emotionally, physically, and academically for my students during this pandemic, I need to make sure that I put me (and my family) first.
So as you are navigating this crazy year, regardless of if it is your first or your fifth or your thirtieth year, please remember to find what it is that gives you peace and practice that often. You and your students will be much better off for it.
As always, if you are struggling and need help, let me know. If I cannot help, I will find someone that can. There are people in all areas of the state who are more than willing to help. Teaching, especially this year, is a difficult job and we, the CONNECT Committee, want to support you in any way we can.
Good luck to you all. Don’t hesitate to contact me.
– Kristen Helland, khelland@isd91.org